how to feel like the worst mother- ever!

1 :: Not hearing your child being very sick in the middle of the night

2 :: Being so concerned about said sick child that you forget to let out your dog all afternoon who then peeps and poops on the floor

3 :: Thinking that said sick child is safe to go back to preschool, when really he isn't (must wait 48hrs) and thus having to explain to child that his brother can go in, but he can't

and for the finishing touch:

4 :: Forgetting what time children need to be picked up from school and therefore turning up late and feeling like the worst mother in the world!

(luckily children and staff were all fine, I however, was not)!!

i like that and that and that, mummy

The new Cath Kidston catalogue arrived this morning and I was overwhelmed with excitement by the time I had a chance to browse through it after our shopping trip out.  I always skim through it quickly before going back through the pages and studying everything intently.  I LOVE Cath Kidston.  Anyway, I squealed with delight when I came across the nightwear section of the dossier.  They had some bed socks which I was desperate for last Christmas (Santa clearly didn't share my love for them) and, wondering why I was so happy, twin one rushed over and proceeded (much to my delight and James' horror) to pick out the following items he thought I would like to have.  He then moved onto these...  That's my boy!

crocheting :: attempt 1

For the longest time I have wanted to learn how to crochet.  I have watched my mum doing it for years and have always been amazed at how quickly she can whip up rounds and rounds of granny squares.  I would say that I am a fairly accomplished knitter- I may only knit fairly basic things, but I can at least hold the needles, follow patterns and tend to know one end of the wool from the other.  When it comes to crochet, however, I am at a loss- the terms all sound double dutch to me and for some reason, I simply cannot hold a hook and manipulate the wool at the same time.

Until the other day....Around Christmas-time I attempted (very briefly) to make a simple chain- and gave up almost immediately.  Then the other week I showed my mum this post, from the wonderful Attic24, as I figured she would love to be able to crochet granny stripes instead of squares.  When I saw her the other day she had started a test run of stripes and, feeling brave, I decided to have a go- and I did it....not very well, I might add.  I am pretty clumsy, count like a madman to myself, cannot for the life of me hold the wool in any normal way, but I managed to complete three quarters of a row.  All.by.myself.  (See the dodgy section- there, in the middle- that's my bit)!!

teddy bear's picnic :: part 2

So, after a few technical hitches here on blogger, and not much free time to boot, here are a few snapshots I took whilst trying to salvage the boy's notion of a teddy bear's picnic.

After the debacle of our failed trip I decided to treat the boys to one of their own, so while they had their nap I quickly downloaded the 'Teddy Bear's Picnic' song, grabbed a few sweety treats and laid out some place settings on our trusty picnic rug.

I think it went down fairly well.

teddy bear's picnic

Is it just me or is this how a teddy bear's picnic should look like.  I took the boys to one today organized by our local children's centre and it was dire.  There were no picnic rugs, tea party toys, enthusiasm, or even many teddy bears in sight!  (We were inside, it was raining, but still)!!  We all sat around in silence with no idea when to start our picnic.  The boys were starving and very bored.  They knew roughly what to expect and they got nothing.  I couldn't really blame them for wanting to run up and down, as there certainly wasn't any teddy bear's picnic going on, but then I felt all eyes were watching me to see how I dealt with this.  Not to mention the staff there have a knack of making me feel like a bad mother (I managed to make one twin cry twice) and I was 'questioned' whilst trying to eat and ended up feeling like I was going to be reported for bad parenting.  Needless to say, we left halfway through the 'picnic'!

the end of an era

Today, the boys had their last Jo Jingles session (they don't know that, yet) and for me, this has marked the end of an era- the end of their baby years.  We started going when the boys were 7-8 months old after hearing about it from a friend and it has, undoubtably, been the best thing that I have ever signed the boys up for.

The sessions follow the same structure each week starting and finishing with a hello and goodbye song and the children are supposed to copy the actions of  a doll sized 'Jo Jingles'.  Each term there is a 'song of the term' which the children learn and sing each week, there is always a blue box with a hidden surprise, and plenty of instruments for the children to learn to play.  Aside from the musical enjoyment the boys have learnt to count to ten, stay quiet when asked and tidy up at the appropriate time.  I can't stress enough just how much enjoyment has come from this 45 minute session.  We have watched them grow up there, from sitting on our laps to gaining the confidence to sit either side of their teacher.  Twin 1 even took his first proper steps there!  It has encouraged them to sing and dance and very recently they have begun to re-enact the actions of our wonderful teacher while at home.

I love the fact that they have (for now) this love of music and dance and I sincerely hope it continues even though we won't be able to go anymore.  However, it really does feel that this is one of key moments marking the end of their 'baby' life and the beginning of their 'grown up' years.

that kind of walk- again!

I think that one of the hardest things about being a mum is the loneliness that comes from spending the majority of your time at home with the children.  maybe it's different if you go back to work and maybe it's different once your children start school and you can have large amounts of time to yourself.  But, currently,  at this preschool age I am finding things tough and feeling quite isolated.  It's not that I don't have a wide circle of friends, may of whom I have met since having children, but with all the little ones attending preschool on different days meeting up is becoming harder to do.

I found myself today with a break in routine as we were unable to go swimming.   I dread these kind of days when our routine is disrupted and I don't have specific plans to fill it.  Typically, it's rained all morning forcing us to stay inside (it's been roasting the last 3 weeks, of course).  We tried finger painting for the first time (so messy), watched Disney films, looked at Disney holiday photos (for the millionth time) and still the morning dragged.  As soon as the rain lifted after lunch I shot the boys outside on their trikes, thinking that the fresh air would buck them up and give them a bit of exercise- WRONG!!!  We made it to the end of our road with one already walking and me holding the trike before indecision forced us to turn back home- thankfully.  However, one needed the potty halfway back and would not go in the road forcing me to carry him and the trike whilst yelling at the other one (bless him) to please hold his trike and try and walk/ride back quickly.  It must have looked a sight dumping one on the potty on the path once we made it back while running back to scoop up the other child and trike. I could go into more detail about how hideous this makes me feel when made to choose one twin over the other and it's always the same one who gets left.  And this always makes me so sad.

Like I said, it can be incredibly lonely, even when you have two beautiful children with you all the time.

big boy beds

I have been dreading this moment for the last three years, and now it's finally happened- we have put the boys into beds.  This is a big thing for me as I do not like change or anything that might lead to a change or break from routine.  To be honest I would have held off for a bit longer as they are happy in cots, they don't ever moan when put in them and up until a week ago, they have never (except once last summer) tried to climb out.  And even knowing that one could get out, I still felt that they were ok in them.  However, we are going away soon and the boys need to sleep together in a double bed and that, combined with potty training, has been the reason we've finally gone with it.

We've chosen little beds from Ikea which extend as your child grows and although at this late stage (some friend's children have been in beds since 18 months) we could have gone for proper single beds, we simply don't have room.  So our plan is to use these beds until they no longer fit the bedroom and then move into bunk beds.

We put them in their beds yesterday and I must say that it's not been completely horrendous- so far!!  Obviously, this is a HUGE deal for them and there is a massive novelty factor involved as they now have free rein of their room during the daytime (which they are never normally allowed).  Yesterday during naptime James sat in their room until they fell asleep, which took less than half an hour (normally a few minutes) and last night we only needed to go in a few times.  Today at naptime I went in after five minutes and yelled at them to lie down and within minutes one was fast asleep- the other followed swiftly once he realised that he had no playmate.  I just hope this continues for a while longer as I'm not yet ready to give up my afternoons!

my own reality (and blessing)

Since becoming a mum of twins (almost three years ago, now) I have become even more obsessed with watching reality shows about families, people with lives similar to mine- that kind of thing.  And since I've rediscovered the world of blogging, I've realized that I can indulge my obsession even more.  One of my favourite blogs to read is 'Life Set to Words' by Maegan Beishline and this post, today in particular, touched a raw nerve.  I have these feelings a lot!  Except, I almost resent my husband for being the one to go to work and leave the house instead of feeling grateful and content that I am the one who gets to spend the days at home with the little ones!

As a follower of Maegan's blog, I enjoy reading her 'Realities and Blessings' posts whereby she turns the realities of her day to day life into positive feelings.  I think this should be my attempt at turning the negative feelings I have into something more positive.  It is not easy being a mum of multiples and certain things challenge me and stress me out in ways I never could have imagined when I thought I would have children.  However, I should think myself incredibly fortunate and privileged to be in the position where I can spend the time with them and watch them grow up into very determined, young boys.  My husband misses out on a lot of things when he is at work and I know he longs for time spent at home with the children.  I shouldn't ever forget that!

it's breakfast time!

I just love how the boys are at the age where they like to imitate everything, and I mean everything, that we do.  Sometimes, this can be immensely frustrating as it's often at times when I'm trying to do something quickly or without distraction.  Other times, their imagination kicks in and they surprise me with scenes like this...

that's not quite right, mummy

Currently, it's all about the jigsaw puzzles.  The boys spend most of their time doing puzzle after puzzle.  They finish one and move onto the next.  They quickly moved from 4-6 piece puzzles onto 15 piece ones and can fit together 45 pieces in seemingly no time at all.  They only need do one once and can then finish it very quickly from then onwards- even upside down and without looking at any picture.  I think that's pretty good for two and a half year olds, but maybe I'm just biased because I'm their mum!

Oh, and if I try and 'help' them with a puzzle their little voices ring out with cries of "that's not quite right, mummy"

it's finished

This was truly a mammoth effort- more in terms of number of years spent on than actual work involved.  I honestly can't remember when I started this blanket other than I know it was a good couple of years before I moved out of my parent's house (that was 2002 and it's now 2010).  I tend to knit as the mood takes me, so more often than not, it takes some sort of inspiration to get me going again.  

My initial idea for this blanket came from my new found love of Cath Kidston and her 'vintage style' which was probably sometime in the early naughties.  I saw this knitted blanket in her book "Vintage Style", immediately fell in love with it and decided then and there that I would knit my own.

Image shown here taken from Tips for Vintage Style by Cath Kidston

I'm pretty sure I stuck to her pattern :: cast on 30 and knit 60 rows to make a simple square, but I think that my squares turned out smaller than hers, judging from the look of this picture.  I also tried to stick fairly closely to her colour choices which happen to blend fairly well with the colours we chose for our living room and bedroom (considering I started knitting before moving out was even a consideration, I reckon that I chose paint colours based subconsciously on my balls of wool)!

The blanket even survived a bad case of moth infestation ::  after a particularly languid spell idling on my bedroom floor I discovered that some squares and a ball of wool were home to a large number of hatching moths- yuk!  

Overall, I have probably done the bulk of the knitting.  I opted to knit the darker colours while mum worked on the paler tones and we both sewed up the blanket.  The border, however, was completely crocheted by mum.  I cannot even say what stitches she used as I have no knowledge of crocheting whatsoever, but I do like the way it has turned out.  It's nice to think that this has been something that mum and I have worked on together.   I like the idea that this can be an heirloom I pass onto my children/grandchildren as something lovingly made by us, just as some of the blankets my mum has at home have been passed down from her granny and aunties.

I now need to decide where my lovely blanket will reside.   It was originally intended to cover the bed and that is where it currently resides (having already passed the comfort test by twin 1). 

However, it also feels like the snuggly, tv watching, dog cuddling type, so may well end up draped over the back of the settee where it's close at hand on these chilly, cold not so springlike evenings!  It's pretty handy at the moment as it's keeping me warm while Daisy snuggles up alongside.

edited to add:: talk about a mammoth event, knitting the blanket was nothing compared to writing this post.  I've been trying to publish it for about a month now and keep on running into technical issues- aahh!!  I think I've finally nailed it!

7 little things

Because I can't seem to ever get around to blogging and/or taking a photo to put in a blog post I thought I'd post a few random things about me (having just seen the idea in a blog I was reading).  So here it goes, seven random things about me...


1 :: I have identical twin boys

2 :: I am addicted to 'real life' reality shows (they have to be American) such as Jon and Kate plus Eight, Tori and Dean, The Hills etc

3 :: Whenever I drink a cup of tea at home (never in public) I always leave a spoon in my mug

4 :: I have wanted to be a palaeontologist for the longest time and when I left university I got the chance to take part in a dinosaur dig in Sundance, Wyomming

5 :: I have a Masters degree in Museum Studies

6 :: I am a typical Virgo and am very picky, finickity and cannot stand mess or untidy-ness of any kind.  That said, I am very lazy and hate doing any kind of housework and spend a lot of time moaning about the house being in a state, but doing very little about it

7 :: I strongly believe I was meant to be born an American.  I love everything and anything about America.  If I read a crime book it has to be American and I really only watch American TV shows

i'm so excited!

Two monumental sporting events happening this week.

Tonight :: David Beckham (he's a god) plays against Manchester United for the first time at Old Trafford since leaving the team.  I have to see this....

And on Sunday (Saturday, if you count qualifying) :: Michael Schumacher (my uber-god, pardon the German pun) makes his return to Formula 1.

Oh, man.  I. Cannot. Wait!

spring was in the air

and now it's gone all grey again....

Still, when the sun shines and the sky is blue the days are starting to feel a whole lot nicer.  Not always warmer- yesterday was bitterly cold- but, last week we had one or two warmish days.

Because yesterday was so sunny we took advantage of this and got the little ones out into the garden.

Then after a long nap (them, not so much us) we had a nice walk along the seafront with some beach time and cuddle time thrown in.

And as the sun began to set we enjoyed an impromptu tea of chips and vinegar.

We should do this more often.....

a little bit of yummyness

The weather may have been cold and wet, but we had the most delicious cupcakes served on gorgeous, vintage china.  A little bit of yummyness to brighten our day!

blanket sneak peek

I am one full row away from completing the 'joining' stage of my blanket.  Then it just needs a border which my mum is going to crochet for me.  In the meantime it is now big enough that I can snuggle up underneath it, while I sew away with Daisy snoring beside me.

where has the time gone?

Well, I haven't been too good at keeping up to date with blog posting since Christmas and now it's February!!!.  I have no real reason other than lack of time, lack of enthusiasm for it?  Who knows?  Anyway, I have been fairly busy on the knitting front.  I realised I was a square short (how did that happen??) and I'm still plodding along with the joining.  I also started sewing together a really cute robin fattie from Cupcakes for Clara which I was desperate to finish in time for Christmas as I thought my boys would love it.  Sadly, this is far from finished.  Maybe next Christmas?  Oh, and my little ones started preschool a month ago.